meme time!

[moonsheen]

I should be packing to go back to school.

So, naturally, I'm gonna do a Top Five meme instead. Ask for a Top Five Anything ("Top five favorite hats!") and I will answer ("1. Blue Hats 2. Hats on Cats..."). The catch is do not ask for my top five, ask for the top five of any fictional character in a series I have written for/have an interest in. ("i.e. No Gain's top five favorite types of sushi." "1) NONE 2) NONE 3) NEVER 4) CAN'T MAKE ME 5) SUBSTITUTE FISH FOR A PINEAPPLE AND THEN WE WILL TALK.")

Comments

[halcyonjazz.livejournal.com]

Dear Delita Hyral

Top 5 horror stories of improper handling of chocobo that you witnessed

[moonsheen.livejournal.com]

Oh, you ask the interesting questions!

1. Do not bear down too hard on a chocobo's wings. True, slight shifting of the weight forward is necessary to accelerate; but only slight. If you'd like to imagine how it feels for the bird twist your arms behind your back and have someone sit on them. You, however, do not have a razor sharp beak and a head capable of twisting fully around and gouging the offender's calf. They do.

2. They like to be groomed. They'll do much of it on their own, but as a stablehand you're still required to take a brush to them so they look decent when his lordship deigns to pass. Males are very sensitive about their crests. If it's bent or broken and they will body slam you into the side of the stable.

I'll note, this one applies to Ramza as well.

3. Accidentally targetting them when it's your turn to attack. Surprisingly, they hate that.

4. There is nothing more frightening than a female chocobo during the breeding season. This goes double for any mounts belonging to Zalbag Beoulve. Open the gates, stand aside, and throw the greens to keep a good distance. She will try to take off your arm. Victims of this treatment include: myself, Ramza's old man, and Zalbag Beoulve.

5. Chocobo tipping: never a good idea no matter how drunk you are.