STILL WORKING ON DRABBLES, I SWEAR.

[moonsheen]

This one looks fun.

Name a character and I'll tell you how he/she lost his/her virginity.

Answers may or may not look suspiciously similiar to chirachira's, considering our occasional tendency to read eachother's mind, but I promise I'll try to be clever in my own vaguely pr0ny right!

Comments

[ruffwriter.livejournal.com]

Ohohoho.

This is me going for the obvious. VINCENT LAW.

[lazulisong.livejournal.com]

I really actually kind of want to know how you think Riku lost it, because I am sure I am wrong in thinking 'Xemnas badtouch'. ...probably.

[moonsheen.livejournal.com]

Disney answer: STILL A VIRGIN UNTIL HE'S GOOD AND LEGAL AND SORA (WITH KAIRI) JUMPS HIS BONES. BUT IN A PG-13 WAY (since that is as far as Disney goes, hi Pirates of the Caribbean). SO THERE'S A CONVENIENT CUTAWAY BEFORE THE DEED IS DONE. which would be in the old treehouse. Or in the cave. anyway, somewhere that will signify that CHILDHOOD IS OVER. in the middle of a summer storm after having taken off most of their outer clothes to avoid catching a complete chill.

Squeenix answer: with Naminé, after he gained the appearance of Xehanort. He was at a low point. She was already beginning to fade. It was very careful, in a desperate, confused way. He kept his eyes shut because he didn't want to look at himself. She held him by the wrists and showed him where to put his hands, because he was afraid he'd scatter her with a touch. It was on one of the tables in the white room. Crayons ended up everywhere. And he didn't talk to her about it for a very, very long time afterwards.

THE HORRIBLE ANSWER: Well, what ELSE do you think he was doing as Maleficent's pool boy?

THE OTHER HORRIBLE ANSWER: Mozenrath, in Agrabah. LONG STORY THERE>

[lazulisong.livejournal.com]

see, I always thought that he and Malificent had that maternal.... actually, never mind, I have to go curl in a ball and whimper a lot now.

I'll buy with Namine for a quarter, though

[dejablue7.livejournal.com]

OMG, you referenced MOZENRATH, I loved Mozenrath!
♥

Great answers, btw. Hah! I love how you gave the Disney answer, then a Squeenix answer...and then of course the misc. extras :)

[therealkaichan]

I want to marry your answer.
It was THAT amazing =D

[fuuchan.livejournal.com]

Hah! I love this meme...

BALTHIER. GO!

[moonsheen.livejournal.com]

The answer Balthier doesn't think counts: with Jules, in the teenaged years, in an alley in lowtown, drunk off his ass and just having gotten the crap kicked out of him in some ridculous barfight spurred on by telling some Ardent in a bar that his chariot (airacers, that is) team sucked. Jules dragged him out of it, poured what was left of his drink over his head, cleaned him up, and then cleaned him up, if yanno what I mean.

Answer Balthier thinks totally counts: a married woman of some stature whom he happened to abduct in a suitably pirate-y fashion. By which we mean: Ffamran hotwired the aircar without realizing she was still in it. After a day long high speed chase through all levels of Archades with a screaming noblewoman in the backseat, it became exceedingly clear she'd actually had a hella good time, and by the time he'd found a safe place to land, she pretty much crawled into the front seat with him. Afterwards she went back to her husband, he never saw her again, but curiously no one could actually ever link him to the theft due to a very odd conflicting eyewitness report...

[ningen-demonai.livejournal.com]

Edgeworth. 8D

[halcyonjazz.livejournal.com]

Re-l Mayer, hohoho.

[moonsheen.livejournal.com]

Night at the opera entertaining in the place of her grandfather: A top-level city official and his subordinate. The production was one that had gotten rave reviews in the news, particularly for its absolute lack of ANYTHING interesting, in Re-l's opinion. She soon discovered through subtle glances that the subordinate, who was around her age, probably shared this opinion. And so during second intermission they attempted to do something a little more interesting in Re-l's car. It was brief, messy, and only marginally better than the show. Curiousity satisfied, Re-l concluded the act was just as useless as the pamphlets always told her it was.

[lacunarity.livejournal.com]

Ramza!

[moonsheen.livejournal.com]

Chira and me used to joke House Beoulve was doomed long before the Good Brothers started killing eachother off. By virtue of the fact that the only one with a potentially healthy sex drive would be ALMA. (Dycedarg might've been married once. ...it didn't work out too well)

Which is to say, Ramza's a virgin. Will (if you accept his survival at the end of FFT) one day think to lose that pesky thing. Probably with some very fiery, much younger woman in a foreign country whose determination reminds him a lot of himself in his heydey. Alternately: Rafa, also years and years down the line during a period when he's come to the rebuilt Galthena village to settle in his anonymity, although quiet legend among her people thanks to the songs she's written about him. It'll be a quiet, discreet affair, and won't be the last. They'll forget to tell her brother about it. He'll probably turn interesting colors when he learns.

The other alternately: ...someone gave him booze instead of milk one evening on the campaign. He was trying to do the hazy responsible thing and drag an equally drunk Mustadio back to camp. Mustadio happened think he was being escorted by a very lovely girl and proceeded to do horrible, horrible things to Ramza's ear. Ramza sort of snapped, dragged him to his tent, and anyway the next morning both of them were doing the walk of shame back up the path to try to find out where the hell all their pouches went while the rest of the party just laughed and Orlandeau shared some horrible soldier stories from his youth.

[nagaina-ryuuoh.livejournal.com]

Ohohohohohoho. ^_^ You just made my day.

[lacunarity.livejournal.com]

Ha ha ha, I would buy all of these scenarios for a dollar! (I actually think the Rafa scenario's my favorite. Poor Malak, I think his head would explode.)

[officialbizness.livejournal.com]

Apollo or Sasuke ALSO I FORGOT TO COMMENT ON HOW MUCH I LOVED THE DRABBLE YOU WROTE MOI. I AM A HORRIBLE PERSON. PLEASE KNOW THAT MY LOVE FOR YOU IS SINCERE AND GREAT, O WONDERFUL ONE.

[moonsheen.livejournal.com]

Apollo lost it during finals week his first year of college to the one member of his study group (academic rival) who was insane enough to be still up in the campus library with him at like, 1 a.m. Somewhere during the course of the night she put her books down, looked him straight in the eye, and told him, "If you pass this and I don't, there is no justice in the world." He asked her to clarify whether that was supposed to be death threat-- she grabbed him by his collar and pulled him to That One Aisle That All Libraries Have. It was the most illegal thing he ever did.

Then he scored higher on his LSATs than her, and she never spoke to him again.

[officialbizness.livejournal.com]

This is entirely true and somehow, someway, Phoenix will find out about it and make her Apollo's next client.

[moonsheen.livejournal.com]

You know it.

I'm also of the mind that if Apollo ever does get a love interest in these games (I doubt it, given these games) her name ought to be Daphne. Because that would be Funny.

[akatonbo.livejournal.com]

Since Chira's already got both of my boys and somebody already named Edgeworth...

Maya. Or, y'know, anyone else from PW that you have a story worth relating for, we are a little bit obsessed over here.

[moonsheen.livejournal.com]

MAYA WILL REMAIN A VIRGIN FOR FOREVER IF PHOENIX AND EDGEWORTH HAVE ANY SAY IN THIS.

But seeing as they don't. She'll probably end up being a super hot 20-something who enjoys letting guys take her out by virtue of the fact it's another means of getting really great free food. I guess eventually one of them'll get her nice enough free food she'll deign to let him do it again. And he'll even agree to pay again. And he'll probably end up being a total closeted Steel Samurai geek. And she'll probably lose it at the end of a long movie marathon in which they argue which generation of Samurai is the ABSOLUTE BEST. They finally just decide to call it a DRAMATIC draw and do it on the big beanbags instead.

And then Edgeworth does an amazingly thorough background check on the guy. Because you can NEVER BE TOO SURE.

[akatonbo.livejournal.com]

EX DEE

(I love me some Fey girls, yes I do. Edgeworth pwns me like nobody's business, but the Fey girls are made out of win.)

[saturnoolaa.livejournal.com]

Well, you asked me about Kyon, so I must ask about other SOS Brigade members!

[whitetenchi.livejournal.com]

VAAN :D

[moonsheen.livejournal.com]

Cargo-hold of an airship they were stowed away on after they smashed up a ship and needed to hitchhike covertly back to Dalmasca on a royal galleon. Dumb friendly wrestling in a very closed space that took a turn for the accidentally really sexy! It was exceedingly bendy and a little awkward and neither of them really knew where to put their limbs (well, okay, more Vaan didn't know Penelo was QUITE THAT FLEXIBLE), and at one point Vaan got kneed in the face. Nothing mindblowing, but pretty much they were so affectionate afterwards that it was absolutely something they were willing to try again!

[bravecows.livejournal.com]

Horatio!

NB. If it is not with Malcolm, I might cry. FAIR WARNING.

Muun will tell you the long version

[halcyonjazz.livejournal.com]

Not with Malcolm, sry :(

WAIT HOLD ON I'LL GET SOME TISSUE.

SPOILER: Horatio is a giant slut. The most chivalrous, polite slut around, but he's still the cock in a hen's nest.

[bravecows.livejournal.com]

;__________________;

[moonsheen.livejournal.com]

Alas, no. Being a DRAGON and having very odd standards when it comes to Noticing These things, Malcolm does not get around to Noticing These Things until after he is married, to a princess with whom he made a political bargain, and this bargain was put in writing. He offered her wealth, power, and a place as one of his closest advisors. She offered him said advice, her line-specific power to see the future (Artemisia's a seer!), and the much required heir. Being a business-minded dragon, Malcolm decided that last one ought to be dealt with.

...but if he'd Noticed These Things sooner? ...fumbling around with Horatio in the royal baths. Absolutely.

[moonsheen.livejournal.com]

AS FOR HORATIO'S ANSWER:

...you'd THINK it'd be Emilia. But no, no. It was actually that more cool-headed blonde maid who turned out to be from the Sword Province, around the time he finally stopped being scared of girls at age 14-15 or so. Probably in some sort of broom closet, or one of the parlors. He was never scared of girls again, although this one really, really confused the heck out of him.

Sadly, even were there fumbling around in royal baths with Malcolm, one of the (older) maids would've totally gotten to him first.

[riko.livejournal.com]

Am curious as to whether your opinion differs from Chira re: can one lose one's virginity to a sun goddess?

Alternately, whatthehell, Hinata.

[moonsheen.livejournal.com]

Answer is 'yes'. But less along the lines of the good ol' bump n' grind and more along the lines of 'pulled temporarily into a world of endless light, where one might savor just a slice of the joy that existed at the creation of the world, the first gasp of wind, the first ocean wave, the first breath of a living being, hearing a thousand songs at once and every single one of the jubiliant, and rejuvenating, things growing and dying and growing again and there is color everywhere and warmth everywhere and it swirls a thousand times over till it all becomes one great expanse of blissful white'.

Probably post-game.

... the ukiyo-e artist may interpret that as they will.

[rezhomina.livejournal.com]

Oh my, your work borders on illegal levels of awesome. Joy!

Mayuri Kurotsuchi. Because that one shower shot was not enough.

[moonsheen.livejournal.com]

To a robot that he made for those express purposes, and then later converted into the division vending machine.

[rezhomina.livejournal.com]

Oho, and here I was thinking there was just something wrong with the Division's drinking water.

Thanks for the laugh! Might I friend you?

[moonsheen.livejournal.com]

The rookies never catch on.

And hee, feel free!